We are currently selling the Jherkin on a "pre-buy / pre-sale" basis. What this means in brief is that there might be some delay in getting your Jherkin and possibly we might be unable to fill your order and deliver your Jherkin if we can't sell enough of the little guys. Very briefly, the pre-sale of the Jherkin rests on a "reserve now, pay later" basis. Let us explain.
Due to the Minimum Order Quantity stipulated by our manufacturer, we will only place an order for a run of Jherkins once we achieve a minimal threshold of orders. We're doing this for two reasons:
i) Sustainability. Unless we know our Jherkins are all going to find loving homes, it would be a waste to manufacture a whole bunch that just end up sitting in a warehouse somewhere dreaming of satirizing late stage capitalism and spelunking butt holes.
ii) Finances. We are a startup. In order to make the Jherkins themselves, our manufacturer requires us to place a meaty minimum order that requires a lot of upfront payment. This is quite expensive as it requires making a mold and doing a minimum run. (Have you seen "Joy", that kinda-terrible movie with Jennifer Lawrence? Remember how they're arguing for like half the film about having to pay for the tooling and mold and its super boring? Yup. That's the situation).
In an ideal world we'd of course place an order upfront for a run of Jherkins and deliver them straight to your home before you've even had time to find place for it on your desk. But alas, them's the breaks.
That said, as soon as the threshold is hit, we will place the order right away and the Jherkins will be on their way to your door.
OK. So how does the pre-order work?
The pre-order is relatively straight forward. You click the pre-order button and our trusted third party service provider ("PreProduct") will take your card details and "reserve" the Jherkin price but not charge your card. Then once we've hit our minimal manufacturing threshold and we know we can do a run of Jherkins, we will then charge your card. You will be notified of the charge. We will then place the order for the Jherkins with our manufacturer and notwithstanding any unforeseen problems have them delivered to you in our timeframes.
OK. So what is the time frames for my order?
Currently we are estimating that from the time we place the order with our manufacturer it should take them about a month to 6 weeks to manufacture the run. We expect then a waiting time of about 2 weeks before it is delivered to you. So all in all, the wait time from the point we hit the threshold, notwithstanding any unforeseen delays or hiccups, should be 6-8 weeks.
What if we don't hit the minimum threshold for the Jherkin?
If the minimal threshold is not achieved, we won't place an order for the Jherkins and you will not be charged. If you are charged for whatever reason, your money in this circumstance will be refunded. We'll also send you a personal email about how sorry we are and possibly a small vial of our tears of disappointment.
From a time frame perspective, if we haven't hit the threshold within 6 weeks from when they first go on sale, we'll take that as a sign from the gods that we have failed and cancel your order.
How much will I have to pay for shipping?
Shipping to the UK, EU and US is included in the price.
What about taxes?
Taxes are covered in the price however depending on your country, you might have to pay an import tax or customs duty. This is out of our hands and depends on what jurisdiction you are in. Check your national rate of import tax. Note however that in some jurisdictions the price of a Jherkin is below the threshold for import tax.
What if there are delays etc?
In light of the above, we would love it if you would be so kind so as to be patient with us. We might not be able to dismantle capitalism anytime soon but we can still try be kind to one another. We will also keep you in the loop about what is happening and when you can expect your Jherkin to arrive.
Please give us a shout if you need further clarity at firstname.lastname@example.org
PRE-SALE TERMS & CONDITIONS
1. The standard terms and conditions of the Jherkin sale apply during the pre-sale except where these terms and conditions vary. By using the Jherkin website and/or purchasing and/or pre-ordering a Jherkin during the pre-sale you agree to the terms and conditions as outlined in the Terms of Service as well as these terms and conditions mutatis mutandis.
2. A sale agreement between yourself and NSFW Solutions Ltd is contingent and/or conditional on the basis of a Minimal Threshold Order ("MTO") being achieved.
3. NSFW Solutions Ltd will be the sole party to determine whether the MTO has been achieved.
4. Upon agreeing to pre-order a Jherkin, the price of the Jherkin will be reserved (but not charged) on your card.
5. If the MTO is achieved, you will be notified of such and your card will be charged.
6. If the MTO is not achieved, you will be notified and your card will not be charged.
7. NSFW Solutions Ltd reserves the right to cancel the pre-sale and/or sale unilaterally before the MTO is achieved and/or before your card is charged.
8. If your card is charged and we are unable fulfill the order for whatever reason, we reserve the right to cancel your order and refund your money.